Joke from a nurse

Joke 1:

One young man called the hospital, shouting, "You gotta help! My wife is going into labor!"

The nurse said, "Stay calm. Is this her first child?"

"No," he cried urgently. "This is her husband!"

Joke 2:

One man boasted, "I have a new hearing aid."

"What kind is it?"

"One o'clock!"